I have always wondered what it would be like to be schizo. Wouldn't that be so cool? You could trip for free! A boring conversation could turn into talking with an angel of god. Waking up would be like getting high! You would just fall asleep to escape the crazy shit if it became too much.
Boring neighbors? Not anymore! They are now 34-eyed aliens! Fat? Not when all food is sprayed with chemicals by Nazi scientists kept in a secret laboratory by the US to keep the sheep stupid and lame.
And, women.... You think there isn't the right man out there for you? Well, think again! This one doesn't fall asleep after sex because the ceiling's caving in. He takes out the trash or you'll slip arsenic into his beer. And he doesn't cheat because you're the only one on his list of people he can trust. He's not even on that list!
And, yes, this post was meant to offend you. If it didn't congats! You have a sense of humour or don't watch too much TV.
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